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The Legend of Zelda is known for its many hidden meanings and messages and I’ve recently found a new one. At first I thought that it must merely be a coincidence, but over time I have realized that there is too much evidence for this to simply have occurred by chance. The Legend of Zelda tells a message of racial suppression and racial superiority. That’s right, our beloved franchise is flat-out racist.

The evidence cannot be misconstrued. It is obvious that all of the following figures that I hereby present have been purposely incorporated by Nintendo to advance their plan of subliminally implanting racist tendencies into the gaming population. There is no other explanation. We’ve been deceived Zelda fans. Let’s look at all of the evidence that is stacking up against Nintendo.

The series is based around the focal race of the Aryans, or Hylians as the game-universe refers to them as. They are named after their Goddess Arya Hylia and are her pure chosen race. Naturally, these white Hylians have blonde hair and blue eyes. It is from the ranks of these ‘pure’ Hylians that our protagonist Link arises. If Hitler designed a person, it would be our hero, Link.

Fittingly, these Hylians used to live up above the clouds because they were all high and mighty. But, again befittingly of white folk, they would eventually come down to the land below where the other lower 'scum' dwelt. Like any English settlement from centuries ago, the Hylians persecuted and subdued the native races.

The Gorons and Zoras are among the races that bowed to the superior white Hylians and allowed them to establish the kingdom of Hyrule in the name of white supremacy. The Zoras become slaves who tended to the water supply of the white Royal Family, while the oafish Gorons were tucked out of sight in a Volcano.

With their massive full lips; their 'brudda' jive talk and those street dance moves Darunia busts out, the Gorons are no doubt intended as a racial-slander at those of African-American ancestry. It is sickening how the series allows everyone to look down on Gorons. They are put aside to eat their rocks where they won’t cause any trouble. Blatant, appealing appalling racism, folks.


Can you tell which is the Gerudo symbol and which is a Muslim symbol?

Hyrule is founded upon racial supremacy, and who knows how many years of torturing the lesser races suffered in the Well and Shadow Temple at the hands of the Shiekah. But wait, there's more! If you think all of that’s bad, wait until you hear the tale of the Gerudo tribe.

The Gerudo are a race of dark-skinned, pointy-nosed, thieves who live in the desert. They live in an uncivilized, poor, Arabesque culture. Heck, they even had the Muslim crescent moon and star emblem as their logo; that is until Nintendo later removed it because of the controversial outcry.

We don’t let the Muslim semiology get by, but we’re perfectly fine allowing the whole series to vilify the darker-skinned tribe as thieves? We’re fine to let Nintendo make the whole series based around an antagonist that is a black man from the desert.

Ganondorf is the very definition of a terrorist. He invades Hyrule, covers it in monsters and darkness, causes the Gods to flood the land, and causes the land to be consumed by Twilight. We sit back and enjoy a series that has a black man from a blatantly Muslim culture commiting horrific acts of terrorism and we call it a 'fun gaming experience?' That’s just sickening. Not to mention, Ganondorf is also a pig. Are all black people pigs then as well?

Ocarina of Time’s Fire Temple even had suspicious religious chanting in the original release. I’m not sure how that fits into it all, but I’m sure it’s relevant. The fact Nintendo removed the chants and the Muslim symbol is mighty suspicious. What are those Japs up to? Oh sorry, I am being racist now too? If so, it is because The Legend of Zelda has made me this way through prolonged exposure to its sinister schemes.

There is so much racial oppression that Nintendo has to answer for in The Legend of Zelda. How many times have we seen Dark Link make an appearance and without any explanation he is a bad guy just because he’s black? Then there’s the Twili in Twilight Princess who are banished to the Twilight Realm for being darker-skinned. There’s even that time when the Sages execute the black villain Ganondorf.


KKK semiology and Zelda semiology are pretty similar.

You know, Majora’s Mask is the best Zelda game ever, so no Zelda article would be complete without mentioning it, right? Majora’s Mask is probably the most racist of the whole series. I mean look at the Clock Town logo. Yes, folks, that is the logo of the Ku Klux Klan (or just 'The Klan' as we call it on the inside). Might as well toss this in the mix as well: the Triforce is also a prominent symbol of the KKK.

Clock Town even has a racist sect of its own. The Bombers stick by their firm philosophy of “No way! No Scrubs,” a motto they spontaneously chant in unison. All around town you will find Zoras getting charged only five rupees while Gorons have to pay 30. You’ll also find Gorons getting kicked out of the Stock Pot Inn and sleeping outside in the cold.

Termina’s Guardian Giants are of an olive-skinned complexion and Dan Merill has written extensively on the topic of their massive dicks, apparently. One minute The Legend of Zelda is all for the whites and then it takes a drastic turn to make white men feel inadequate compared to the other races.

If you are still not convinced of the series’ innate racism, then it is time for the ultimate evidence that spans right back to the beginnings of the franchise. Check out the original Legend of Zelda, Level Three. Yes, its layout is what you think it is. Despite the Japanese telling you its 'The Manji' this dungeon is a swastika. If you still need more, Link got his hat from the KKK and just died it green.

The Legend of Zelda series is really, really, really racist, and that’s why we love it. Errr, I mean, how can we all support such a disgusting series? We should all feel ashamed and bad and stuff.

Perhaps we should just be thankful that Link doesn’t speak, because if he did we’d hear him call Ganondorf “nigger” more times than the word is used in Django Unchained. But whatever. At the end of the day, racism doesn’t matter if we can just all get together and have one massive party at Lon Lon Ranch.


Yes, that is Level Three from the original Legend of Zelda.

Footnotes

The ideas for this article are completely unoriginal and were pieced together, copied, and plagiarized from discussions on every Zelda forum on the net known to (white) man. Yeah, I know, some people really get right into writing about this stuff… oh… kind of like I just did. Oh well, it’s just an innocent gaming series, folks.

To misconstrue The Legend of Zelda as seriously racist you would have to be Toju The Militant Black Guy. So please vote for me on Balls of Steel.

Also, no disrespect is intended towards Dan Merill and his excellent work analyzing The Legend of Zelda series.

Have a peaceful, harmonious, and racially accepting day, Zelda Informer readers.

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